PUT THE RAG ON IT!

Ever had your shoes polished by the Shoe Shine Man?   I’m not talking about the shop where you can drop off your shoes and pick them up later.  I’m talking about the Shoe Shine Man where you sit in the seat with your foot up on the foot rest.  Have you ever watched him work?

When you sit down, the Shoe Shine Man applies the polish paste to the shoe using a soft rag.  He does so in small circles, not smearing or slathering it on.  He’s working the polish into the leather, because it has conditioners and other things to help nourish and protect the leather.  Once the polish has been applied he grabs his brush and begins to vigorously buff your shoe; again, working the nourishing and protective qualities of the polish into the leather.  You’re thinking, “WOW!  My shoe is looking good now!”    

But he’s not finished! 

The Shoe Shine Man reaches into his back pocket – I don’t know why its always in his back pocket – and whips out a rag.  WHAP!

He puts that rag on that shoe like piranha in a feeding frenzy.  WHAP!

Even spanking it a few times.  WHAP! WHAP! 

When he’s done putting that rag on it your shoe has a mirror finish.

A new lover wanting to cage you is a similar process.  No really!!

Let’s say you really really like this new guy you’re dating, and the sexual attraction between you two is getting hard to resist.  So one night you stop resisting and the sex is ALL that.  Hooray for you! You’re living in the moment, and doing your happy dance! Your guy tells you he wants the two of you to be exclusive and to see where this thing goes.  (That’s man speak for: I’m not going to be around to put a lock on it so I need you to lock it down for me.)  Otherwise, just get to it buddy!

Your new lover, your new Shoe Shine Man, polished and buffed the hell out of your shoes.  You’re feeling confident and mighty sexy.  You are moving through the world to the tune of dick! The hormones flowing through your system are going to drive your body to hunt.  To hunt, quite frankly, for more dick.  (Yeah, its a little crude but you’re a grown-up so deal with it!)

Now for some women that buffing is just fine, and they can be good until the next time the Shoe Shine Man pays them a visit.  BUUUT, not all women. 

Stop whining and I’ll explain why! 

Some women will never be corralled by a man who isn’t around to put the rag on the shoes he buffed!

Let’s say you got your shoes buffed Friday night.  You thought he was sleeping when you snuck into the bathroom Saturday morning to freshen up.   Like he’s gonna believe you wake up with minty fresh breath!  (But, you know how we do.)  Well, he wasn’t asleep.  He saw the extra sway in your hips that even you hadn’t noticed.  He knows he did a fine job and needs to put the lock in place.  He reaches into his back pocket for the rag!

Saturday morning, you’re his breakfast treat.  WHAP!

Saturday night he takes you out for dinner and dancing.  You’re against the wall in a bathroom stall.  WHAP!

Sunday, its against the wall in your living room.  WHAP!

Monday you meet him for lunch.  You’re on the hood of the car.  WHAP! WHAP!

 

Tuesday, you’re bent over the sofa.  WHAP! WHAP!

Wednesday, its his kitchen table. WHAP!  WHAP! WHAP! WHAP! WHAP! WHAP! WHAP!

I know you get the picture because you’re panting and your eyes have glazed over!

When your Shoe Shine Man put the rag on it, he was satisfying your body’s need to hunt.  You’re prancing around throwing off all kinds of physical and chemical signals into the ether and catching the attention of other men.  With a sassy “How you doin?”  YOU ARE WIDE OPEN! (In case you were wondering: That’s why it seems like other men suddenly become interested in you after some man has buffed your shoes.) 

A smart Shoe Shine Man, and yours is pretty smart, can’t have you moving through the world to the tune of dick.  You’re liable to do something stupid!

NOPE! He needs you moving through the world to the tune of HIS dick. 

When he’s done your body will have all kinds of muscle memory.  The chemicals you emit into the ether will be comingled with his.  A signal to other men that someone has already locked you down and caged the tigress.

And you?  Your mind will be clear.  Laser focused.  Not clouded by the hormonal changes in your body.  Your co-workers will be wondering what’s gotten into you.  They’ve never seen you work so efficiently.  Your trainer will be stunned.  No whining about burpees from you.  He asked for 25 and you gave him 50.  You can do the NY Times crossword puzzle in 3 minutes flat.  YOU’RE A BEAST!

And with your body tamed and your mind clear, you are now open and able to explore the possibilities of a new, and hopefully, lasting relationship.

 

So, how is your Shoe Shine Man?  Has he put the rag on it? Or are you hunting?