YOUR GRACE PLACE!

A couple of weeks ago I had the pleasure of attending the Newark leg of the “How Sweet The Sound” tour (it’s a national gospel choir competition).  This year, the tour is being hosted by gospel song writer and producer Donald Lawrence, and gospel singer Yolanda Adams.  The judges are Erica Campbell of Mary Mary, Fred Hammond, Bishop Hezekiah Walker and CeCe Winans.  It was a night of great gospel music.  Even Yolanda Adams and the judges performed!  (CeCe Winans has one of the most beautiful voices in all of music in my opinion!) 

Anywho, at one point during the evening Donald Lawrence spoke to the audience about ‘embracing your grace place’.  His point, “When you find your true-grace place things just flow, provision finds you and doors just open.”

I’ve been wanting to blog about this grace place thing since that evening, but the more I thought about it the more questions I had.  The most nagging of which is “How do you find your grace place?” After all, you want to make sure you embrace the right thing. Right?  I mean, your grace place can’t just be something you’re good at.  There are people out there that are very very good at stealing cars. I wouldn’t think that would be their grace place!

So I took to scouring the internet!

Now I didn’t just go surfing willy nilly.  I made sure I had some idea of what I was looking for.  Some of the theological definitions of grace are: (1) the freely given, unmerited favor and love of God; (2) the influence or spirit of God operating in humans to regenerate and strengthen them.

So your grace place will be influenced by God, and presumably, be so pleasing to him that he rains down love, blessings, and opportunities upon you.  You know the “and God saw that it was good” moment.

Well that eliminates the car theft skill!

After days of surfing, I finally came across a sermon titled “Finding Your Grace Place” given by Pastor Obed Martinez of the Destiny Church in Indio, CA.  Pastor Martinez used the story of Jonah and the whale to make his point about finding your grace place.  If you’re like me, all you knew is Jonah ended up in the belly of a whale, and the whale eventually spit him out.  But what had happen was God gave Jonah a task to do, and Jonah left town because he didn’t want to do it.  He bummed a ride on a ship with some friends, and God brought a storm that scared the bewhosits out of everybody.  Jonah knew the other folks were in danger because of him so he jumped overboard and got swallowed by Moby Dick’s grandfather’s brother on his momma side.

 While I thought the sermon was good, it missed the mark for me.  After all, Jonah was told by God where to go and what to do and he was trying to run away from that.  I’m more interested in what if you don’t know what to do.  You don’t know what your assignment is.  Pastor Martinez did however provide some words of wisdom I feel are worth thinking about: 

(1)  God saved you from, so that he could save you for.

(2)  God rescued you so that you can become a rescuer.  But you were not rescued to be a savior.

(3)   God has given each of us an assignment.  When the enemy is attacking you he’s not attacking YOU but he’s attacking your assignment.

(4)  Most of our messes don’t come because of the devil, we give him too much credit.  Most of our messes come because we make decisions based on the pressure of the situation rather than the principles of God.

(5)  When you try to run away from your problems they will eventually show up in the place you ran to.  That is why you have to learn how to deal with your baggage.

(6)  You are never caught in something that can trap you.  God always has an exit strategy.

(7)  Even if you make a decision based on pressure, God will allow that circumstance to come around again so that you will then make a decision based on his principles.  What you think is denied is only delayed.  And the storm you had to go through was there to get you back in the position to make the right decision.

As I was gathering my thoughts for this blog, I was rethinking these words of wisdom from Pastor Martinez.  I now have other questions. (Is it me or does it seem like this spiritual journey has more questions than answers?)

The new questions that come to mind are: Am I supposed to find my grace place? Or does my grace place find me?  Is my assignment my grace place? When Jonah was in the whale’s belly did he eat sushi? Did Moby Dick’s hostility against little old men in boats come as a result of Jonah giving his grandfather’s brother on his momma side a belly ache?

???.....questions!…..questions!…..questions!

It is said that the way to get an answer to my question is to pray on it.

Now that I think about it, God seems to like that.  A LOT!! 

Hey! Could it be that praying - seeking the wisdom and guidance of God in our decision making - is our grace place? Could it be that to pray is embracing your grace place? And could it be that through prayer (our grace place) we learn God’s will (our assignment) for our lives?

Mmmmm…..something to pray on huh?

 

Smelly manners

Dictionary.com provides 3 definitions for the word “etiquette”. One of which is:

“Conventional requirements as to social behavior; proprieties of

conduct as established in any class or community or for any occasion”

In other words, knowing how to act!

Stopped at the gas station.  It’s a station I’ve visited many times before.  There’s a guy at this particular station that usually spends a lot of time flirting with me.  This trip was no different.

Let me say that he isn’t bad looking and has an amazing body.  But he doesn’t have any teeth.  

Correction….he has 3 rotten ones.  

We all know how I feel about teeth.

Any who!

I was the only car at the station so I had his full attention.  

In order to feel the full power of his animal magnetism he has leaned down into my window resting on his very muscular forearms.  I was rather enjoying the whole crowding my personal space with his wide shoulders thing, but focused on his eyes and tried not to look at his mouth. 

BECAUSE HE HAS NO TEETH!! (Sorry)

After about 5 minutes of him trying to convince me to let him show me a good time, I hear a noise.  Actually it sounded like a tire going flat.  I mean it was loud.  I started looking around, but he seemed unconcerned.

Then I learned why.

The smell hit me so hard I almost choked.  His fart smelled like something had crawled up his ass and died!!

It was one of those smells that burns your eyes and gets in your mouth.

I turned the key in the ignition and started rolling up the window.  I nearly took the man’s head off!

I keep febreeze in the car so I started spraying my seats, the air, the dash board, everything!

He thought the whole thing was hilarious.  I thought it was rather disgusting.

I mean, you’re trying hard to get into my pants, so I would think you wouldn’t want me to smell crap (pardon the pun) coming out of yours!  This must be a male thing cause even little boys have a fascination with farts!

Where was the etiquette?  Pretend you need to look at the gas pump or something!

So, the handsome guy with the amazing body…..has no teeth, no sense of etiquette, and something dead in his intestines.

Where is the justice!!

REFOCUS!!

You ever get too caught up in “the living” of your life?

I know how that sounds! But think about it a minute!

Sometimes we get so caught up in “the living” that we don’t really live.

You want a better paying job, and know that you need to go back to school to get it.  You’ve been wanting to go back to get your masters degree.  This past February you researched several programs at nearby colleges, and even some you could do online.  You thought very carefully about how to manage work, school, the kids, the kids activities, everything.  You bought books and programs to prepare for the GRE, and even registered to take the test later this month.

But instead of studying, you’ve spent the summer doing “the living”. You’ve gone on trips with the kids, your crew, and your new boyfriend.  There’ve been cook outs, block parties, amusement parks, and night cruises.  You’ve enjoyed every minute of it.

Now the kids are back in school and its back to the routine.  It suddenly occurs to you that you now only have 19 days till the GRE.  OH MY GOD!  WHERE DID THE TIME GO!  There’s no way you’ll be ready for the test!

My point is, sometimes we get so caught up in “the living” that we lose focus of the big picture that is our life. 

When you started researching schools and gathering studying materials a spirit of change had come over you.  Something in you knew it was time for you transition into a new stage of your life.  That transition cannot occur without you.  A very wise man of God once said “Do not forfeit the blessings of change by avoiding the process of transition.”

Yes! You getting caught up in “the living” is avoiding the transition!!

You walked past those books more than a hundred times this summer.  You moved them from the dining room table, to your bedroom dresser, and eventually to the floor in the corner of the room.  Would it really have been so bad not to go to every summer party, and spend some time studying?  Especially those times the kids were elsewhere?

God made a promise to you, but he needs your help to fulfill it.  He wants you to have that better paying job, so he planted in you the drive to go back to school to get that degree so that you can get that job. 

You were fired up this past February.  You were taking steps you hadn’t before, and they were long overdue.

Don’t get lazy now!  You’re a caterpillar and God wants you to transition into a butterfly.  The process will require some sacrifice and struggle on your part.  It may even be painful at times.  But the beautiful you that emerges will have made it all worthwhile. 

REFOCUS!!

Going fishing!!

There are many factors that go into fishing successfully.  You have to take into consideration the weather, location, the best time of year and day to go after your target fish species, and making sure you have the proper equipment - just to name a few.

When a fish gets caught on a hook it quite naturally struggles to get free.  It may jump, swim around obstacles, or just speed off trying to make a run for it.  The key to successful fishing is not to panic.  When the fish tries to get free don’t start to try to reel it in quickly.  Let the fish do its thing!  Eventually it’ll get tired and then you can reel it in slowly.  Each time it shows there’s more fight left in it, just be patient and reel it in a little more when it gets tired again.

Regardless of what kind of fish you’re after, patience is the key!!

Have you noticed that fishing is a lot like relationships?

There’s a certain someone you’d like to become a permanent fixture in your life, and you’re confident your-love-interest feels the same.  But you’re so afraid they’ll get away that you decide to stake your claim.  You begin to press the issue of a more monogamous and permanent relationship.  To your surprise you’re met with resistance.  Your-love-interest begins to pull away from you.  If you’re not careful you could lose them all together!

Like I said, a lot like fishing!

The hook is the fact that your-love-interest spends time with you, and really seems to enjoy it!  You seem to have all the right equipment – character, personality, intelligence, etc. – that keeps your-love-interest coming back.

Now when fishing, if you try to reel your catch in too quickly you could rip the hook right out of its mouth causing injury.  Ergo, pressing your claim too aggressively could damage your relationship.

It’s only natural for your hooked fish to fight to get free.  When love blind sides us we tend to go on emotional defense.  So you pressing your claim could overwhelm your-love-interest, and trigger the instinct to flee.  Putting emotional, maybe even physical distance between you. 

But if you’re patient, and allow your-love-interest to grow into your relationship, you’ll find in them a partner who can appreciate all you have to offer.  Someone who will gladly stay at your side.

WOULD YOU?

This one is for the ladies!

I like interesting people.  All of my friends, near and far, are interesting people.  When we get together, interesting topics of conversation usually occur.  This past weekend, I got together with some friends, and true to form, the conversation covered some interesting things.

The topic that came up?

“What if your perfect maintenance man was a woman?”

Ok. Ok. Maybe I should have eased into that a little bit.  Some of you are choking on your afternoon coffee, or those M&M’s you got from the vending machine to help fight the 3:00 o’clock sleepies.  So I’ll give you a minute to collect yourself. 

Ready?  Here it is again: “What if your perfect maintenance man was a woman?”

I can hear you all: “Ewwww!!!”  “What has she been smoking?”  “That’s just sick!!”  (I know that’s what you’re doing cause that’s what we did :-D)

Now that you’ve gotten that off your chest, we can have an honest discussion.  Here’s a scenario:

You’ve been approached several times by a woman who has let you know that she finds you very attractive.  She would like to spend some time with you; preferably in bed.  She will do whatever you want and will allow.  There will be no pressure for a relationship or repeat performance.  Eventually you agree, and meet her at a hotel.  You found the experience quite satisfying.  (Ok you admit she was good.) Before you part ways she lets you know how much she enjoyed you, and that she’s available whenever you need.  Afterwards, she doesn’t start bombarding you with calls, or spreading the word the two of you were together.  There’s no discussion of the experience on her facebook page or anywhere else.  She’s all about privacy and discretion.   

Got it!

Would you prefer she was someone not ready to step out of the closet, so you’d know your encounter would be a well kept secret?

Would she need to be someone you know very well, or someone you’re only barely acquainted with?

If she’s a girly girl, would that be too much like being with….well…a woman?

Would she need to be more masculine so that you would feel more like you’re with a guy?   

When you’re with man, you’re a participating lover.  You like to kiss, lick, and taste him.  Would you be a “participator” with a female lover?  Or is the idea of touching or kissing her a little too repulsive?

Would you want to lie there with your eyes closed, fists balled up in the bedspread letting her do what she wants, while you pretend she’s someone else?  An ex-boyfriend maybe?

If you took another woman as a lover, does that make you gay?  Or would it simply mean that you are open to different possibilities for sexual gratification?

According to Sigmund Freud “in general to undertake to convert a fully developed homosexual into a heterosexual does not offer much more prospect of success than the reverse.” (The Psychogenesis of a Case of Homosexuality in a Woman) (1920)

Considering taking that woman up on her offer? Make sure your secret is safe with her!!!